Divorcing a Narcissist in Virginia

Divorcing a Narcissist in Virginia

Narcissistic Personality Disorder (NPD) is a psychological disorder which includes traits like a lack of empathy for others, an inflated sense of self, and a deep need for admiration and attention. 

Divorcing is difficult enough, but a narcissist can make a difficult process even more contentious and troublesome. 

This is because the narcissist will likely create more blame and problems than necessary.  Negotiating and coming to an agreement can seem impossible. 

Here are some important things to keep in mind when filing for divorce in Virginia.

Set Reasonable Expectations

Divorcing a narcissist, as mentioned above, is going to be a difficult process. It will take time and a lot of patience. 

A narcissist will do whatever it takes to prevent their spouse from reaching their goals. They may resort to petty tactics to get their spouse to react emotionally to every single issue. It’s easy to get drawn in, but it’s just as important to remember that it’s impossible to beat a narcissist this way. 

Know Your Rights

The best way to avoid getting scared or intimidated by anything that a narcissist says or threatens to do is to learn about how the law works. There are plenty of resources online to help navigate the legal process. 

It’s also highly recommended to work with a knowledgeable and qualified divorce lawyer who can help understand the challenges of a narcissist’s personality. 

A good divorce lawyer will help their clients understand their rights and their options.

Protect the Children

Most narcissists are unlikely to be effective parents. However, in certain cases, a person may have no other choice but to co-parent with a narcissistic spouse, especially while a divorce case is still pending. 

Here are some tips to prevent the narcissistic spouse from using the children as pawns to achieve their desired result:

  • Spend enough time with the kids and don’t spend more time than necessary to talk about the narcissistic spouse. The latter may decide to twist the situation to manipulate the child, so it’s best to avoid talking negatively about them.
  • Make sure that the children know that their needs are important and shouldn’t be brushed aside or taken for granted.
  • Custody exchanges should be done in public places to avoid loud arguments.
  • Avoid fighting with the narcissistic spouse in front of the children.
  • It’s also a good idea to let the children talk to a therapist who can help them deal with their emotions during this difficult time.

Get Finances in Order

Narcissists feel the need to completely control every aspect of their life, including marital finances. 

A narcissist spouse may try to control their finances and make the other party feel like they’re unable to survive without their presence. Any person who’s seeking a divorce from a narcissist should take certain steps to protect their financial freedom. 

Here are some of them:

  • Save up enough funds to last through a long and drawn-out legal battle.
  • Check credit scores regularly and make sure that it’ll help in securing a reasonable mortgage or car loan in the future.
  • Get copies of all relevant financil documents including bank and credit card statements, tax returns, pay stubs, and investmaent or retirement account documentation.
  • Avoid letting the narcissistic spouse know as they may block access to important documents and prevent the divorce from moving forward.

Contact an Experienced Divorce Attorney Today

A low-conflict divorce may allow you to handle your divorce on your own, but that probably won’t be the case if you’re divorcing a narcissist. You need a skilled and experienced lawyer by your side who can help you achieve the best possible outcome for the case.

At Holcomb Law, we understand how challenging any divorce can be. Talk to us honestly and openly about your case, and we’ll make sure that you’re armed with the support and resources you need to come out of your marriage better and stronger.

Call us at (757) 656-1000 or message us to schedule a consultation today. You’re not alone—we’re here to help.